My Peepoo Na Mumu Love Carry Me Come Here Today O!

As you may already know, I am Ugandan by birth, British by upbringing and Nigerian by marriage, to be precise, I be Warri geh. Area!

Ever since the first day we met, TY has been “washin me”. Even though I knew it was all wash, I liked it. I liked it all the way to the alter, to the delivery ward to give birth to our lil’ strong Itsekiri boy and even up to baby number two. I was a mumu for his kinda love ooo and I still am. No be small thing. Back then when he would approach some Nigerian girls at Uni, they would reject him with their British accents and ask him to stop being “Razz”. When it came to my turn to be razzed up, I fell hook line and sinker. I loved it. I loved the way he sounded, despite the fact that I could not understand half the words he said. As a sharp babe sha, I learnt fast. I asked questions and practiced until I eventually got it. Well most of it. I nor too sabi speak sha but I dey try. At all at all nai bad pass and you know say Warri must not car-ray last.

Till this day this my guy still dey press my mumu button upandan but na so I like am. Yes, I left the UK, and moved to Naij. Why? This my oga wash me scatter. I be mumu? Na you sabi. I hold my side tight and my bele sweet me die. I’m happy.

My point? There is always someone out there for everyone, or don’t you think so?

Special thanks to my amzing editor, Toju Adejumo for turning my 'broken' pigeon english to correct Warri pigeon english!